I choose this me, for right now

All my life, I’ve had to conform to others’ expectations of me. I had to consider myself last. It’s not easy on a chemically imbalanced brain to be forced to consistently conform to everyone’s definition of ‘normal.’ And then making minute adjustments for a lifetime, to please everyone else. With my unique brain chemistry, I have the potential to be anyway I choose.

I am NOT accepting requests for changes to myself at this moment! Please hang up and dial again later! 

Don’t expect me to be anything other than who I am. I Need this time right now to discover all the beautiful connections and interactions in life, and spread laughter, love, and encouragement. I feel drawn to be exactly who I am at this moment. 

I don’t have the energy to be anyone but who I am right now. I’m fighting too many battles at once, while trying to inspire and encourage a lot of people...including myself. I could absolutely be whatever I wanted to ‘allow my chemistry to shape me to be.’ But, I’d have to give up a lot of my ethics/morals to do that. At my core, I am a contradictory personality; but I’m mostly a loving and caring human. 

I’m allowing my brain the time it was never given to heal from so many traumas over my lifetime. My inner bitch is justified in its existence, and she mostly plays well with others. So, no harm, no foul? At least I already know I’m an awkward individual and I’m brave enough to ask the bold questions to start people talking.